Hmmm.

To say ive been aggrivated the past two days really wouldnt do the feelings justice. Shitty drivers on the road. An old man who tried to bean Me with a cane. Fucking super hot temps. No AC. Suckage......all around like a rising tide and guess who forgot his swimming trunks...

Ive been eating alot of prunes lately. Mainly because I dont want to look like one. The whole antioxidant, non aging thing. Biochem wasnt My strong suit.

So I have been shitting my brains out, sweating, and avoiding old men.

The old man was really something though. It all started with me exiting the food court workers doors with a large supply of deposit bags on My way to the lower level exit doors. I saw "him" and his wife breaking the sound barrier heading My general direction but since I was moving light speed, we all know who was going to win this race. I passed a foot or two between him and a column to My right. Didnt make contact, didnt make eye contact either, I was....."In the zone" scanning for danger, and B-lining for My big metal piggy bank.

"wait!" (in a old french accent)

I turn around not 5 feet from the man and he has his cane over his head, his wife is silent and he is obviously pissed off.

"cant you wait!?!" (still shaking the cane, more like a club this time)

I gawk, make some face like incredulousness, and being pissed off Myself. I turn and give a quick glance over My shoulder and he is still swinging his tree limb like a mall nazi.

Ok....deep breaths....

I had to walk away as I heard mall security snickering. I wasnt going to fucking deal with grandpa and his mute wife. I resisted all temptation to say something sarcastic, and kept My composure. I didnt say "I can wait, you will prolly be dead in a minute anyway". I was a good Ghost. I also didnt get closer to let him pummel Me with all his 100lbs of might could muster. He definately would have gone to jail for assault, and possibly armed robbery. Old fuck or not, I am a 270lb asshole with a gun. When I have money in My possession, I have no friends. I can be friendly (sometimes) but Im not your friend. I cant afford to take chances.

I was almost expecting to hear him say "if I was your age Id let you have it"

*sits pondering this with a straight face*

I know of many people younger than me, who wouldnt even give me a dirty look, let alone attempt to "teach me a lesson". I will mark this whole experience to Alzhiemers/lost brain cells/wet diaper/ stupidity and let it slide. Im suprized his wife didnt try and stop him. Bet he is gunna get lucky for his bravery. After strained peas she is takin out her teeth....

*shudders*

Still brutally hot.

Eating alot of raw veggies has me wondering if I will cause green house gasses like the 5 billion cows on Earth.

My aunt Norma is in the hospital again. Lungs full of fluid, and I dont expect her to make it to xmas. She is My fav Aunt. She is over 80 now.

And I am unusually horny. Walking into a stop with a bag of cash helps onlookers from eyeing My groin.