"Where have you been?"

"WHere did you go?"

I am slave to my new career.

WHich brings me to an interesting point of view. Well sort of. All thw work and study put into this new career change is a goal right? I should be happy about that right? Fucking overjoyed?

Somehow i cant help but feel the attainment of a goal just feels like a open plateau to yet another hill to climb. I know, I will be toatally happy and successful right over this hill. Plateau. Ok, this last hill is the one then I am success. Plateau.

How can I feel Ive succeeded when all I really see is a neverending ridge of hills? When does reality set in and slap me in the head and tell me what I already know. Such as get real, open your eyes and see it for what it is. SUccess isnt measured in dollar signs, or material wealth but by how you feel personally from the experience and what it has done for you. Sort of like Bhudda sitting under the tree for enlightenment.

So maybe.......(pause for reflection) I have succeeded and this is the residual crap from the previous failure trying to overtake me like a wave. So really Im surfing on a wave of crap soon to hit shore. Got it.

hello campers.

Ive been away. Wont be the last. They shipped me to galveston texas (yeehaw!) by car to a vessel in dry dock. Called the Uncle John, its what is referred to as a MSV semisubmersible. Basically its a floating oil rig, with multi capability. Oil derrick, 3 cranes, ROV and Sat divers. Big...mother....fucker...

It took 135 steps and a series of scaffolding to reach the upper deck. Vertigo was a constant companion and high winds made for interesting climbing. About 14 to 15 stories to give you some scale. The markings on the pontoons measured the top deck at over 200 ft. The pontoons were nearly 300ft long, 50ft wide and 50ft high. Actually make that 60ft. it has two. They look like boats themselves except they are always underwater. The propellors were over 8ft high, and there are 8 of them on board.

I arrived on board at 8pm on a monday night. 12noon to 12 midnight will be my shift. I arrive one bag short. 90% of my clothes left in LA. Meaning the pants I was wearing, the underwear, some socks and 4 shirts were my entire wardrobe. I also didnt bring any tools as I was informed I wouldnt need them. Which was a lie.

Unprepared and also told its only a two week stay to hear it will be months by a supervisor, My heart sank. Lies suck. Especially when they know better then to mislead a newbie.

Watch your step. I know I did.

So I was a "glorified rigger" which meant I was lower on the pole then the 8 malaysian riggers on board which came up to my armpit. "Deck Bitch" would have felt better. I chiped rust, paint, scale and dirt. Rigged cranes and painted parts of the vessel before they were welded back in place. Like the 10 ton "horse head" anchor swivels they had on deck for me to scrape the rust out of and paint with primer. Tis the quickest way ive ever seen to go from clean to dirty in 1.2 seconds.

The work sucked donkey balls. The food kicked ass. I had steak at least 4 times a week, with prime rib for a late night snack. So... as a result I got fatter, despite climbing stairs all day and night.

The last day worked there was an incident. When helping to move the heel section of a large crane boom on deck I saw a sheave which was in the way. A sheave, caled a "shiv" down here was a (unknown to me at the time) 1200lb leage metal pulley wheel for the cranes many cables. About 4ft high on its side it looked like i could roll it out of the way. I was mistaken.

When it started moving, it also started falling. Towards me. it struck my right inner thigh first, quickly sliding down despite my efforts ( I did slow it down, but it was too heavy) pushed me offbalance and rolled my foot underneath me and stopped on the inner portion of my right foot. I was very, very embarrassed. And lucky as hell it didnt crush my leg. A smaller guy would have certainly been seriously injured. I limped away with a bruised leg, and a ankle sprain. It took 4 guys to lift it high enough to get my foot out. Lucky, very lucky.

And stupid, Ghost.....

I only saw the 30 ton crane section overhead. Not really thinking what was in my head was wrong and not to touch it. Stupid, stupid. A very dangerous job. I will be fortunate not to kill myself.

But Im back in LA. Least till I heal then its a new vessel to work on. No laptop yet. Car is getting worse. So Im a cripple, with a bad car, and no life. Doing good I am. *small laugh*

Other than that lifes fucking peachy keen... o_o