First thing is that mom might be coming home in a couple weeks. As she has progressed in her therapy we are hoping she will be strong enough to continue to get stronger in her home.

Something more extreme, and out of bounds for me is that I....have decided..........to get my motorcycle license.

Some will cheer, some will wonder. Given My opinion of crazy bike riders who hit cars at high speeds, or pull wheelies at intersections people will wonder what possessed me to come to this decision. Fair enough. Several factors come to mind. The cost of gas keeps rising and it is my belief that a motorbike uses last fuel than a car and will be a better investment in terms of a commuter vehicle to just get to work, or school. I dont really know the exact numbers yet, as I just started my research. But specs will play a large part in if I actually purchase a bike (preferably used) for commuting. Deep down I have always been interested in owning a bike, but never mustered the courage to go through with it. As recently mentioned My distaste for the creeps already riding was another reason I have not tried sooner. And finally....

Someone I know just got her license.....it would be a shame to not be able to keep up with her. Would be a fucking crime I think....

So what to choose, and why?

I couldnt afford a classy ride. Harley, Indian. And she is going to buy a brand new Kawasaki Ninja. No, classy wont do. I must rise up and at least show up to the line with a respectful ride. A Suzuki "Gixer". More accurately labeled a GSX-R, probably one of the finest racing machines ever built. Sport bikes are inherently fast. So speed wasnt my primary concern. I have no intentions on racing this thing on the street, or becoming a dead body before its time to die. Manueverability, and stopping power were my major points of concern. Nothing on the road can outperform a sportbike when it comes down to making quick moves. But important to remember I am talking at highway speeds. Legal highway speeds. I will be a defensive driver. The thrill of the ride shouldnt be ruined by a trip in a ambulance. I also plan on buying full leather gear, and inrolling in a high performance motorcycle school when time permits. Simply put it will be needed to feel completely comfortable, and confident in the saddle.

I found out today...

I wont be jinxing it this time. They sounded so excited on the phone. They had good news for me. I aksed if they saved a bunch of money on their car insurance by switching to well....you know. They laughed and assured me I was unconditionally approved for My loan. All that remains is My physical form to be signed by a doctor. Everything is completed. Class is scheduled to start May 1st.

This leaves two weeks to finalize everything, transfers..paperwork. Pack, and get my ass in gear. Mentally I was precrastinating mainly due to the fact I had been burned twice before and now I am like sort of gasping for air. Oh shit, here it is again. And no shock, I am still not ready. I will take the last reamining week before class to pack and move my things to the room I will be staying in for 5 to six months. And just as before, I am scared of change. Despite the good it will do for me. I am a creature of habit, and change makes me feel naked.

Once again religion finds its way to the forefront of the headlines. Once again I am forced to open my big fucking mouth on said subject to put some thoughts to rest.

A week ago there was a newscast who had a guest named Bill Nye (the science guy) a rather well known tv personality and science guru who gives lectures and was a host for a kids tv program. During one lecture he made a comment about how the moon and the sun are "source, and reflector" and not something created by a diety written in the bible. Of course I lack the eloquence to say it just right but you get the idea. In short order several guests got up from their seats and left the room. A few even shouted jeers at him. "god is great" or something else I wasnt directly privy to.

Anyone who knows me well enough, knows I have little tolerance for people who take themselves, or concepts too seriously when they dont deserve such distinction.

When does ones personal beliefs, make the laws of physics, laws of nature, or anything already proven irrelevant? By challenging scientific fact with praise for a diety they made themselves look (to me) like some lost citizens of an ancient civilization. An Aztec sacrificing a life to make it rain. Greeks praying to a collection of stone to bring good fortune. It seems too out of date. Too rehearsed. Unrealistic. Like trying to convince that shadow in their room at night isnt the boogeyman. Despite the best assurances mom and dad can offer.....no dice they still freak out when the lights go out. If Bill would have offered a parting prayer of his own, maybe it would have mattered. Like dad "slaying:" the boogeyman and appeasing the child that all is alright, and the fantasy world continues.

Some people are so afraid of the truth, they will fight it tooth and nail, because they know "thats the way it is".

On the same note, I asked a few religion based questions to a co worker who is a pastor at his church. What a can of worms I opened boy....he tried everything to convince me. The same old "power phrases".

"God created everything, thats why....."

"Its what God wanted"

What a simple, pacifying sentiment. Like slaying the monster under the bed with one slash of the invisible sword of truth.

If god created everything, and you really believe that, well then......thats the way it is. End of debate. Faith once again claims another free mind. Stare fact in the face, the faithful will always leap off that cliff hoping for a miracle. Every now and again someone gets lucky. But that doesnt stop the hordes looking for direction or a place to go for answers. "God has all the answers" has a comforting effect on the disenchanted. The wanderers looking for a shepard.

My coworker tried to convince me of the creation portion of genisis in the bible by explaning that god created man (in his image) and thats why man couldnt be decended from ape. Or why man could never be turned from man to woman. Only god can do that. (I started to get tempted to say something) He became heated, like the faithful tend to do. Defending the bible. I didnt want to corner him, so I asked general questions after that. But when he asked how I could say ape became like man he didnt like my explanation.

Something along the lines of a random mutation in a ape which survived to later generations over millions of years and continued to mutate. In his mind the world was created only a few thousand years ago by god and thats the way it is. To hell with carbon dating. Archeology. Why even bother, if god created everything.

He even accused science meaning "science" of trying to play god. I thought science meant "the study of". So how does a study, be compared to a almighty being? Exactly, I dont know either.