Sunday as I arrived at a supermarket for a pickup I saw something before my eyes parked right in front of the building for all the world to see. It was big, long and curved. It was the Oscar Meyer Weiner-mobile. Oh yes, it was. I didnt have a camera or I would had pictures taken with me posing near the huge wang. Hard not to feel inadaquate next to such a sausage. But I did get a little miniature weiner whistle from one of the people running it and now I go around asking people if they want to blow my weenie. There have been several offers of holding my weiner, and playing with it but no blowing thus far.

I still have not gotten the time to go see my nephew yet.

Shaddap.

I was the recipient of a phone call last night wherein someone attempted to ask me for my address so that they might: "mail me a chirstmas present". This isnt a absurd request but they asked about 7000 times and I answered no about 7000 times but had fun doing so. Diffrent funny voices are a must when having a neverending conversation with the same question/answer combination. It would be boring otherwise. *nod, nod*

I am "attempting" my diet again. I am sick of the weight I have regained, and the depression it brings back. I was happier being poorer, but thinner, than making beter money and having to use a asshorn to get my buttcheeks in My workpants. Sort of looks like a snow shovel, but without the ridges.

Do chickens have souls? When they die do they go to chicken heaven? SO when we murder 7 billion chickens next year we can mourn their passing as we do everything else right? Why did I listen to Jerry Fallwell preach on TV late Sunday night about how the war on terror will be won by "saving" all the muslims. That they need to be brought to christ-or-something for it all to end. Is this guy that fucking delusional? They would fucking gangrape christ if they saw him. And stone mary for being a whore. They dont give a shit about anyone but themselves. Maybe we could harness the souls of chickens to get them. Or better yet the souls of pigs so they can kill them with the essence of dead bacon. Sausage will win this war. Why do people put blind faith into a belief where a diety of any type will want to indulge in human focused power trips? If they are so perfect what the fuck do they need us for? Moral guidance? If everything is all figured out already, no need to have us to prove a theory. We would have already been killed. No "god" who is perfect needs imperfect people to justify themselves. As they would have emotions anyway.

Still no dice on the financial aid ordeal. It is a large source of stress right now.

Its been extra difficult to get out of bed these past few days. Even writing this is a chore for some reason. I dont get it. There is no sense of urgency in My body. I could be out making things happen but instead I am just sitting here moping. Nothing to justify it, and no excuse for letting it happen but I dont care I guess. I just dont care.

I offended an overly religious catholic lady in a bank vault yesterday with the whole weiner talk. She seemed mortified by it and frankly speaking I dont give a shit. It wasnt her conversation, this is still a free country and I can say whatever the fuck I want to. Fuckity-fuck-fuck. Weiner. o_o Why do some people take themselves too seriously where they force their own beliefs and morals on others. They should have their head crushed with a rock for doing so.

I took My requalification class for state registration last week. It consists of classtime, and them requal with My duty weapon. A NYPD officer gave the class and evaulated our shooting for the course. Most of it I knew, he simply reworded some things which made sense to me. But when it came time to grade My target for qual he was shocked. "I cant score this" I smiled and informed him I was a Marine Corp Range coach and he said he could see how. My target had the center X ring completely blown out by bullets. I must say it was cool. Perfect score for the second time in a row. Not too shabby for not having shot much this year.

I fucking hate being tired. Hate feeling like its hopeless and no use trying. Having hope someone will give me the boost I need, because I cant do this alone, and I thought I could.

Maybe I could pray to the dead chicken souls for help.....