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10:56 p.m. - 2005-10-07

I needed a new watch. This is what I ordered:

Shock resistant, water resistant, solar powered, and auto set by the atomic clock. Pretty spiffy.

And this of course is still My wet dream. I plan on adding a supercharger to it. Oh yeah, its going to be black. Like thats a shocker...

Wasting time onj Gameboy, playing a movie I wont finish and I should be sleeping by now. I finished filling out the forms for the school and I will send them Monday.

We are a complacent species. Satisfied with the normalcy of routine and anything to the contrary really throws us for a loop. Beats us emotionally and we wonder what we did wrong. The truth is nothig is wrong, it is just inexperience, nerves and the doubt of the unknown tomorrow. Having stared down the barrel before, I can take many things in stride. Competent in My ability to see things through chaos, danger and despair. Even when alone. Growing up I was usually the strong one. Least I made it seem like I was. Letting things roll over me like water from the shower, even when they felt like they ripped their way through me instead. It is hard to bear the burden of tough times. Treading through like you are in mud to your waist. There is no apparent way out. You have no direction. Inexperience is the ultimate teacher. You learn what it is to be human, to find your way the only way you know how. The best way is found out by surviving the hard times. And hopefully, you are not alone.

May you have fair winds, and following seas.


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