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6:23 p.m. - 2005-05-06 My fingers are cold again.Today being a day off of work, I took advantage (finally) of a gift certificate to a massage parlor. Ive never been to one of those before but I was eager to get a rubdown. Arriving freshly showered I was given the groundrules. Strip to whatever level I was comfortable. Either in boxers, nude whatever. I wore boxers. She started with My head and went south from there. Just like a steak, I was turned over just once and before you knew it the hour was over. I am now nicely oiled, and eating fruit. I will have to go again sometime. Not just for the rubbing, but for the shen on My skin. I could slide across sandpaper Im so lubricated. TMI isnt it... She even rubbed My ass. NO ONE has ever rubbed my ass. Im still conflicted about that. I swear Im at some sort of crossroads. The path widens, and I see multiple directions I "could" take. There is no wrong path, nor is there a better path to take over the others. But just as well there are no maps, or directions for these roads. No one knows where I will end up, in what condition, and how I will feel at that time. I hate not knowing. I visualize short term goals most of the time, the ones which influence My life directly at the moment. I try not to put too much thought into "what if's" which seem too unrealistic. I am one of the pessimistic humble types. I rarely go out of my way for a good time, nor do I seek dangerous hobbies. Usually I think its best to stay somewhat grounded and maintain that safety bubble so I dont lose control. I heard via a message board about a girl I used to know. She is expecting a child. It has been 2 years since I last spoke to her. A long time to lose contact. She moved from her home, to another state, and is starting over. I still care about her. Very much, and I dont know if she realizes it or not but I hope everything works out for her. EVen if she wants to face it alone. This morning when I woke up I had a lucious waking dream. Correct in the smallest details. You were there, with me in your bedroom. It was romantic, hot and made My pickle twitch in My shorts. I can still feel your body against mine......and that thought alone makes me want to use my oiled skin as a lubricant. Im a dork I know.
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