A brand new Mercury passenger van "attempted" to swerve and miss a stalled car in the left shoulder, and instead took his chances against the big blue thing to his right.

*cough* dare I say it? We won....

A retired police officer too. Smooth move ex-lax...

It nearly tore off his right quarter/rear bumper and I told him he was lucky we didnt kill him. The best part was the police response was immediate, and its cool to see 4 squad cars weaving in traffic and racing to the scene......

The first thing they asked?

"how much money is on the truck? Is the money ok?"

Cops are cute.....

I sort of mentioned My yearning for a pretty bullet dispenser yesterday. As much as a cute trinket like that would be in My ahnds, it is merely a want. Not a need. My life is a endless list of needs. Car, pay off debt. Get less ugly/fat. Get laid....

As much as I enjoy aspects of My chosen vocation, it lacks something which would make it more fullfilling. A decent paycheck. Oh I know what you are thinking, how could I possibly want any more than to hug those large bags of loot and smile all day.

I get less than $10 an hour for all that excitement, and danger. Not to mention the accountability which comes with a promise of a visit from the FBI if I screw up. Thats $10 BEFORE taxes....

o_o

SO yeah, I will get shot by a bazooka for a bag of money, when I cant afford to sew My belly back up after the fact. What gives....

And for all of you who gawk at me mentioning my measly payday........dont take yourselves too seriously. Most of us make shit pay. Some of us are just willing to speak how fucked up that is. Poor unite!

Problem is we wouldnt be able to afford the dues anyway. Scrap that idea.

If anyone wants to hire a sadist, I will take a fair fee.