I was married to a girl, whom I had apparently met while working. How long the relationship had been on for was unknown. She had cheated on Me in our own bed, and gotten an abortion to hide a child from a husband she had wanted to break away from. Not a bastard child, but his own flesh and blood. The irony was she forgot they had CCTV cameras and security in the house to wittness it all and I said nothing in the attempt to reconnect with her and let her come forward to admit this all. She did not, until we went to court to break the marraige clean. Even after her family ttied to set me up as a bad guy by stealing a weapon of Mine to a phoney crime of passion. 24 hours after hearing me bawl in court with the evidence of her infidelity.....she blew her brains out.

I woke up crying.

I dont know what it means. I dont know why it ended this way.

Why women I am involved with dont honor or cherish me. Even when I try.

Someone I worked with today, a supervisor is one year older than I am. A rather popular and good looking guy. He flirts insesscently with all the female clients we went to. I sat in the truck. he recently broke up with his girlfriend. And that was his excuse to sleep around with other women behind their backs. Its people like him that make it impossible for guys like me to have a chance. He ruins the women before we get a chance.

He is the stereotype.

And Im just the asshole left with nothing.