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7:35 p.m. - 2004-01-01

Im very tired...

Today was long, sleep was short, and customers endless. Sometimes retail can suck major ass. Today being a prime example of why people go shopping. Major savings..... and not to sound stereotypical......it was all the cheap bastards. The ones who actually have money.

I bought three books tonight after work and Im planning on doing a few book reviews, candid of course and filled with insight. I will play "devils advocate" with My choices of literature, and Im sure it will be intriguing.

My first title will be:

"The Satanic Bible" by Anton Szandor LaVey. A heartwarming tale of happy, fuzzy feelings sure to melt the coldest hearts. o_o Im serious....thats the first book. Stay tuned....

My new years was uneventful, boring, and cheesy. I played Nintendo all day and night. Then didnt get any sleep for work the next day. Everyone else was hung over, I was merely tired. Some things test My patience more than others. Im generally easygoing around work.....and its rare to see Me worked up over something. But last workday I had, Tuesday before new years I had some kids test My patience. Horseing around on equipment, then looking at Me stupidly when I nod My head in a "no" fashion. I then walk in to where they were and repeated My request in a verbal manner. The tone of My voice should have been suffiecient, but I was wrong. These were special kids. Aged 15 to 16 tops. Instead of complying, they decided to laugh at Me. Ok, now Im pissed.

"get out, now"

"well we dont need an attitude"

What did you think you are giving Me you little shit....

"well Im telling you to leave....now' *pointing to the exit*

"whatever"

*points to his friends*

"your with him, your leaving too, go"

"no were werent, we are waiting for our moms"

"good wait outside"

By now I was close to drawing blood. Im not used to people laughing at Me, or giving Me lip. but as I mentioned earlier.....these were special kids. They eventually left, laughing, muttering things.......as long as they were leaving so I didnt have to see them, I could care less. Was I short with them? Perhaps.....but attitude begetsw attitude....and I will win the battle of wills. Needless to say I was a raw nerve the rest of the night.

Most of My feelings lately have been consistant, circulating between two major extremes. The lonelyness is ever apparent, and unyielding. What the heart yearns for, the mind must remind that some things.....might be out of reach. Right now My friend is My computer, and My game console. They are the only things keeping me company. My car is still in the shop, and they cannot give Me a quote as to how much its going to cost Me. Coupled with late payments due to said vehicle repairs are just about driving Me to acts of violence, and loathing of the world. Im trying......to accept people around me......but its hard sometimes. Im not like everyone else. Writing things like "Ghost's do not touch or I will break fingers" on food items in the break room which are mine. Some laugh, some wonder. The ones that wonder are the smart ones. I will indeed snap bones if you steal from Me, food or anything. Lying to Me is also a pain offense. betraying My trust, could be a cripple offense. And I take it seriously. Your first mistake in dealing with Me, is to not take Me seriously. Despite My character flaws......I will enforce My will upon you, should you choose to gain My full, undevided attention by doing something shall we say.....stupid. Above mentioned acts count. As do others....but I wont list them here as common sense should apply. But then again, not everyone has common sense......too bad. Stupidity should be painful.

"look me in the eye as My equal, kneel and serve if you choose, or stay the hell out of My way." GOG

The choice is yours.....choose wisely.

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