I was born in Queens NY. St Johns hospital, in Flushing. We lived near Jordan St, in a basement apartment. My parents, Lloyd and Marion were poor, but My father had a good job driving a forklift for a company many should recognize, Domino sugar. I remember little being so young there, but I still to this day have some memories intact. it was a two bedroom apartment. Cement floors. I remember a birthday, some toys, My playpen, and My older brother John. He was born legally blind. He has partial tunnel nearsighted vision in his right eye. Thats all. I remember My rocking horse, something I would ride to comfort Myself, and its also something which has stuck with me to this day. I remember one day waking to see My mother in tears, and looking like she had been in a fight. The landlord, and his wife had double teamed My mother, for more money and beat her up. When My dad returned home he was pissed, and had plans to hunt them both down, but the never saw them again, and we moved out soon after.

It was our first home. A three bedroom house with a large yard. I was 3 years old. My oldest sister, was born shortly before we moved into the house, and I remember rocking back and forth on My horse, when My parents asked me if I wanted to hold her for the first time.

I also remember My parents using a rubber spider to keep Me out of the refrigerator.

There were times when I was locked in My room when My mom went to go pick My older brother up from the bus stop. I hated being locked up alone, especially with no one around. Then when they returned I was allowed out again. Soon I would start kindergarden.

I was a tree climber, mischevious little bastard who would sneak and steal candy from the house or experiment with household chemicals. I was always curious about things. The nearby woods was also a alluring place for Me. Watching the Muppet show before bed. Coloring Easter eggs. Decorating our fake tree for Christmas. I was innocent about the outside world. For all I knew life was the same for Me as it was everyone else. My parents did a good job of keeping us protected.

Kindergarden was......diffrent. I also remember the first day of class. And the cute little girl in the plaid blue dress. Her name was Emily. Short, dark hair, and a ribbon. I was ..... taken. As names were called out for seating I was barely paying attention. Boy she was cute. Her name was called, and she took her seat. Without even thinking, I got up, and sat down right next to her. Ms. Osbourne My teacher with a smirk asked me to get up and wait My turn. I was embarrassed, but I still liked the new girl. And I didnt care much.

Eventually My parents, and her parents found out about My little crush and I was soon invited to her house, for cookies, and to play in her sand box. Also her bday party, the one with the funny magician. In essence, she was My first true love. And My first girlfriend. After kindergarden, she moved away, and I was heartbroken. I wonder where she is now....

Time passed, I learned to ride a bike on My own and then I was riding the streets like the little demon I was to be. My parents made friends with neighbors who lived down the street. Their two sons Kevin and Mark, were to be My first experience with family friends, and they were the first ones responsible for scarring My fragile little mind. See the squeeking frog entry for one particular example. Mark was a teaser, and bully. Forever trying to scare Me with bugs. Kevin was a willing henceman part of the times. I usually walked to school, as it was only about 6 blocks from My house. We would cut through the swamps in that part of the neighborhood, and it was in places like that I would play and be late for school.

There is alot to explain about the next few years, and I would never have the time. its all flashes of memory. Some good, some bad. The inner thoughts of the child that never grew up still palying in My thoughts. Some things to this day, are still seen as special by that little boy, and its him which keeps Me sane. I still rock Myself, either in My chair, or elsewhere when I need to calm Myself. or relax listening to music. Some things never die.