Im brooding over things Ive said, and maybe should have kept silent about. The shards of glass once again find thier mark and shred at My mind. Its ironic that words can cause so much confusion. Regret......I fucking hate regret. It is a ever constant reminder of things we shouldnt have done, could have done, or failed to do.

Im really good at causeing problems...by creating them for Myself. Hoping for things, then not getting them in return. I simply shit on Myself that way. Im whining, bitching at Myself. Im My own pity party, table for one. In the dark.

Am I being to over critical? Maybe Im just overdoing it somewhere.....and its not as bad as I make it out to be. Who knows. Im really trying to be a better man. Heaven knows Im trying, after the things Ive seen. Just dont expect Me to change overnight. I need time to change.