Well, cornflakes have been eaten, Im such a gourmet. Boxer shorts on, and socks. I bought My work shirts yesterday, and took My youngest sister along for the ride. met My immediate supervisor, and made small talk. He doesnt play golf either, imagine the odds of that. So My black polo embroidered shirts are ready, and My khaki shorts/trousers too. They said sneakers, but maybe I could get away with wearing grinch slippers on the first day, or perhaps not.

Some of My friends online, are in dire straits....and have said they will not be coming online, or writing in thier journals anymore. Often thats the only way I get to speak to them, and its starting to hurt. Friends are all I hold of value really.....and with them is how I guage My happiness. Dammit. I try and help...to listen to the troubles they have, but I cant force them. I wont be selfish like that, they mean too much.

One of the girls I advise/train/counsel finally after a month or so decided to break the silence. She believed I was mad at her, when I wasnt. She is a troubled little thing, and we finally worked out the problems she was having. I find it funny in a way, that so many would seek My advice even if its just words on a screen. In some way I am truly helping them, and I do feel good about it. I just dont understand where this wisdom comes from, to Me its just common sense.

I start work tomorrow and I dont really know what to expect. I am nervous because I do want to make a good impression. But something in the back of My head tells Me Im going to fuck things up by trying to hard. SOmething I feel I am guilty of on more than one occasion. Like a hyper-active teenager on his first date. Am I talking too much? Am I talking too little? Is she talking too much? Should I just shut up now? What did she just say? Im fucked......

Ever look at an item, somewhere in your room, your home, and a memory comes flashing back to you as clear as when it happened?

Random memory: